Excuses

No. More. Excuses. 
I signed up for a Virtual Run a few months back when I had motivation. I was a part of a "movement challenge" during which I had to move for 30 minutes a day. The group in the challenge was so motivational. So.....I signed up for the virtual run.  I figured it would be a great way to get back to running after an injury at Thanksgiving and celebrate another trip around the sun. When I registered I did NOT have a fractured wrist and the weather was not below zero every. Damn. Day. (for more on the virtual run click here Fellow Flowers - No Excuses Virtual Race )
So...with my 52nd birthday looming large, the weather above zero (10 when I went for my run) and the sun shining (a rare sight), I thought today was the perfect day to toss my excuses out the window and try running. I pulled out my buried cold weather running gear from the boxes beneath my bed and got bundled up.
A few weeks ago, we adopted a rescue dog and he has been walking buddy. We walk for miles every day. Today was going to be the real test as we tried a run together for the first time. The goal today was a 5K. Just 3 simple miles in the neighborhood. I mean, I run marathons.... but I have not run in months and I was scared. Scared to fall. Scared to fail. Scared to get hurt again.
As I got dressed and got him ready, I kept making excuses. The Negative Nellies in my head were growing louder by the minute and I ....I am the master of procrastination. So it was time to put up or shut up.
Out the door and off we went. I started my Garmin and the Motigo recorded messages for the run. I am not going to lie...it was hard. My head was so much more excited about this run. My body just had to keep up.
As I ran I thought about so many things. The past 3 years of my life have been ...well...challenging.  Truth be told, it has been difficult for a long time but I made excuses. No more.
I have written about the gift that Girls on the Run has been ...and continues to be...for me and for others in the program. Tori and Mel in my ear today was just the message that I needed...the message that I give to others. Just try. You are stronger than you think you are.
I thought about the many changes in my life and how, with this birthday, I am not the same person I was a year ago.
About 1/2 way through the run, I realized that my phone was about to die. I always start with a fully changed phone and because I had "puttered" and made excuses, my battery drained. So I swung home, got a portable charger, and went to finish the run.....but Lucky and I were feeling good. I was actually sweating! We were doing a run/walk and I began to remember what I loved about running. So we did another full loop and then headed home. We ran 5 miles.....well almost!  We had to go up and down the block a few times to make it an even 5....because I am freak like that! But we did it....we ran 5 miles!
I do not make resolutions, I set goals and work towards them. This new year is about getting rid of the excuses and creating something new. It is about taking chances and making changes. It is about being the woman I have spent my life working towards....No. More. Excuses.
Peace.
#forwardisapace
#tutulady

Direction

The whole "New Year/New Me" stuff has gotten me thinking. I know I have not written anything in a while. I really did not think I had any thoughts worth sharing and on top of that, I had a lot going on in my life. So with the new year, I am going to do a lot of things...like start writing again.
However, herein lies my question, one that I posed on social media and will ask again here...

If I stopped teaching today, what do you see and the perfect business/job for me?

For months, I have had dreams every night and know that I am not teaching but I never can recall what I am doing. Don't get me wrong, I love teaching, but I do not think that is my destiny. I feel that there is more out there for me. I love coaching young girls and women. I am passionate about so many things that I am having difficulty finding direction. I know that there is so much more for me and I can feel it in my bones but I do not know which way to turn, what to look and where to go.
A woman came to my home today and proposed that I become an independent beauty consultant. While I like the idea of independence, I am not sure that this is the right path for me. I want to eventually write my story ...the story of my past few years....but I also want to do other things. My mind swims with ideas but I feel like that fish on a dock....flopping all over not sure which way to go just wanting to get back to the water because it is safe.
How do people find direction? How do people focus passion? How do people create the life that they want....especially if they are not sure what that life looks like?
So...for now I move forward but that is all I know...
Peace.
#forwardisapace #tutulady